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You have experienced a tremendous learning experience by having shared your life with someone who has taught you a lot about love, life and yourself. As you heal from the relationship's end, it is perfectly normal to miss your now ex-partner, but do know that the kind of love you're looking for is out there. It could be in a new founded relationship, or a re-connection with your past-partner at a later point in life.
There might be several reasons why people find themselves thinking about exes.
Processing the loss of the relationship
Imaginative - thinking of ways to get together, expressing unsaid emotions
Feeling the energetic connection of your past-partner.
One of the most frequent client statements is, "I know I need to move on, but I cannot stop thinking about by ex." It's normal to hear a client say this after the first 6 months after following the end of a long-term relationship. Yet, even with logic of knowing that one must "move on" - thinking and dreaming that result from still feeling the energetic connection between the two people, can be hard to stop without disconnecting on all levels. It's a difficult challenge to stop thinking and dreaming of someone while there is still an energetic, or psychic, connection alive.
If you realize that you cannot stop thinking about your past relationship, and it's affecting other areas in your life, the below steps will help you.
For example: you cannot focus while at work, and it is affecting your overall performance. Here is an example of how to release someone from your energy field with the use of a grounding cord.
When you release another person from your energy field, you are actually freeing their energy so it can be returned to them. If at the present moment, your desire is to reunite - freeing yourself of their energy will also help speed ease this process. As your past partner energy returns to them, their body will filter the old negative energy. They will not feel as anxious, which will make it easier to communicate with them. Once you have successfully returned his/her energy - the two of you can begin to reunite in a more pure fashion.
If you were the person who ended the relationship, and now wish to find new love. Freeing yourself of this energetic connection will ease your mind as well as open yourself up to the energy of someone new.
1. Visualize a grounding cord - A strong rope, a column of light, a tree or waterfall, an extensions of your legs, etc. ... the grounding cord starts from you first chakra (located at the base of your spin). It extends down and connects you to the center of the earth. Whatever you are releasing drains out through your first chakra being pulled down your grounding cord with the help of the earth's natural gravitational pull. Visualize what you are releasing reaching the center of the earth. It cleanses itself with the heat from the core of the earth, dissipates and returns to its original source.
2. Visualize your guilt - You may experience guilt or fear when you visualize a loved one draining down your grounding cord. These feelings have to do with the breakup and your agreement to support, carry and feed that person your energy. With the resistance of your past partner to detaching from your energy, feelings of guilt will arise. What color represents your guilt? Visualize the release of your guilt draining itself down your grounding cord.
3. Visualize your ex - Visualize your past partners' face. Visualize the color of their eyes, their smile. Visualize their full body. What color represents their energy? Now visualize your ex and their energy draining down through your grounding cord - they continue to fall until they reach to the center of the earth. Visualize their energy releasing and reaching the center of the earth. Where it cleanses itself with the heat from the core of the earth dissipates and returns to its original source. Watch as his/her energy returns to his/her body, which you postulate growing happier and healthier as it fills up with what was once an absent essence.
4. Send love and gratitude - Thank you is the most powerful words, for it works like a release, and acts like a knife cutting any energy streamers coming to you for an exchange. It acts as acknowledgment of the energy presented, but it will stop the energetic flow.
5. Repeat - sometimes we renew connections when we think intensely about others. If at any point, you feel you need to repeat these steps, just repeat it.
This visualization technique can be use to sever energetic connection from anyone who is currently draining you (your co-worker, friend, sibling, parent).